Typically at the end of the year, you might see a lot of chatter about reflecting back throughout the year. But with the holiday crunch, it’s sometimes impossible to truly take the time to reflect.
Then January rolls around and there’s chatter about setting intentions, goals and new habits. It feels, well to me anyway, that we don’t even have a chance to take a breath before moving onto the next thing.
I believe this is one reason why resolutions don’t work. Even intentions. It’s because we haven’t had time to sit still and allow ourselves to fully reflect. There’s another reason too, keep reading.
For the record, I enjoy doing both of these activities because it’s truly helpful. But the pressure of having these things done at the end of the year can be overwhelming. This is why I allow the new year to happen THEN I take the following week to set aside time for reflection and goal setting.
First, I have a strong opinion about “intentions”. A lot of people might not agree with it. The word “intend” means to plan or want to do something. I feel this word doesn’t hold enough weight.
You may use the word in this manner, “I intend to get to that project.” Which really means, maybe I’ll get to that or maybe I won’t.
Does this make sense? I believe it’s an easy out because you can defer plans and wants.
You’re probably wondering, okay grammar police, what should word or phrase should I be using?
Simple… goal setting. That’s it. Nothing fancy or complicated. To “set” is more permanent.
REFLECTION
Let’s circle back to reflection. I like to take one hour, that’s all you need to reflect. Here’s my simple process:
Visually Stroll
Take your phone and scroll through the past year of photos and videos. Even if you don’t capture much, still do this.
Write it Down
Use your preferred way to write whether it’s in a journal, notebook, Google doc or notes app. Answer these questions:
• What brought me the most joy this past year?
• What didn’t bring me joy?
• What didn’t I do that I really wanted to do this year?
• What discoveries about myself surprised me this year?
• What habits did I stick to?
• What unfavorable behaviors popped up (if any)?
• If I could redo the year, what would I have done differently?
GOAL SETTING
Now comes the fun part…goal setting for the new year. Take what you wrote in your Reflections to help you with this process.
(1) Let’s look at what brought you the most joy. Is it feasible to add more of this in your calendar for the new year? If so, physically add this to your calendar for each month or every quarter.
(2) Let’s also look at the things you didn’t get to last year that you really wanted to do. Is it feasible to add this into your calendar this year? If so, physically add it to the day or month when you want to do these activities.
(3) Now let’s look at the habits that stuck. Continue to keep these up. You might have a few new habits you’ll want to try out. If so, slowly add those to your weeks or month. Remember not to overwhelm yourself with too many things.
(4) Lastly, look at what you wrote about redoing the year. Is it possible to create that type of year in this new year? If so, set reminders on your calendar to plan or do these things.
Remember, it’s not about “doing” all the things. It’s about bringing more joy into your life while finding a happy medium to take care of responsibilities.
Let’s live our lives instead of just living.